Chistes buenos en inglés para un blog de chistes en español
¡Hola amantes de los chistes! En este artículo vamos a explorar el mundo de los chistes en inglés, específicamente los chistes buenos que te sacarán más de una carcajada. Aunque estemos acostumbrados a los chistes en español, nunca está de más expandir nuestro repertorio humorístico con chistes en otros idiomas. Así que prepárate para reír a carcajadas con los mejores chistes en inglés que hemos recopilado para ti. ¡Vamos a empezar!
He just needed a little space.
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Girl: You would be a good dancer except for two things.
Donald: Yesterday you said it was H to O.
Doctor: No, but I’ll be able to see if your neck leaks.
Chistes buenos en inglés
5. What do you call a fake noodle? – An impasta.
What’s the best way to talk to a T-Rex? A: From a distance.
Why are there fences around cemeteries? Because people are dying to get in.
The youngest turtle said he would go home and get it if they wouldn’t eat the sandwiches until he got back.
Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill.
Los mejores chistes en inglés
The doctor to the patient:’You are very sick’
1. What did the cold cayenne pepper say? – I’m a little chilly.
Did you hear about the skeleton who walked into a cafe? He ordered a cup of coffee and a mop.
Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
Risas en inglés
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
The student: I walk. You walk ….
What did the calculator say to the math student? You can count on me.
Girl: Your feet.
Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut?
Teacher: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
Teacher: Little Johnny, MAY I go to the bathroom?
Boy: What are the two things?
The teacher to a student: Conjugate the verb «to walk» in simple present.
I told my computer I needed a break, and now it won’t stop sending me Kit-Kats.
B: It’s because your feet aren’t empty.
What does a spider’s bride wear? A webbing dress.
Little Johnny: But I asked first!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
4. Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? – Well, he was just lucky it was a soft drink.
A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up. «Wow!,» said her father, «That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?»
Patient: Doctor, I think that I’ve been bitten by a vampire.
The teacher interrupts him: Quicker please.
A week went by, then a month, finally a year, when the two turtles said,»oh, come on, let’s eat the sandwiches.»
The doctor says, «I have some good news and some bad news.»
I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
I told my computer I needed a break, and now it won’t stop sending me Kit-Kats.
Why do you take baths in milk?
A snail walks into a bar and the barman tells him there’s a strict policy about having snails in the bar and so kicks him out.
What has two legs but can’t walk?
Once there were three turtles. One day they decided to go on a picnic. When they got there, they realized they had forgotten the soda.
I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
Suddenly the little turtle popped up from behind a rock and said, «If you do, I won’t go!»
Donald: H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O.
A year later the same snail re-enters the bar and asks the barman «What did you do that for?»
The man replies, «Oh no! If that’s the good news, then what’s the bad news?»
I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
The student: I run. You run …
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
What does the Lochness monster call his favorite dish? ‘Fish & Ships.
What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt!
The man says, «OK, give me the good news first.»
A: When I stand on my head the blood rushes to my head, but when I stand on my feet the blood doesn’t rush to my feet. Why is this?
Patient: Will it make me better?
Where do cows go on dates?…MOOOOvies
The doctor says, «The good news is, you have 24 hours to live.»
Teacher: Why are you late?
What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh.
I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
«Wrong number,» replied the girl.
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
I told my wife she should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.
What sound do hedgehogs make when they hug? Ouch!
Teacher: That’s nice. Were you helping him look for it?
What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
The doctor again:’Yes, you are very small too…
6. What did one banana say to another banana? – I find you appealing.
2. Which dinosaur knows a lot of synonyms? – The thesaurus.
Why is no one late in London? Because there’s a big clock right in the middle of the town!
The patient to the doctor: ‘Can I get a second opinion?’
Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.
Little Johnny: Teacher, can I go to the bathroom?
The doctor says, «The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday.»
What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.
Student: No. I was standing on it.
Doctor: Drink this glass of water.
Patient: Doctor! You’ve got to help me! Nobody ever listens to me.No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say.
3. What did the philosophical sweet potato say? – I think, therefore I yam.
A man receives a phone call from his doctor.
I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.